The show opens with Corey Ford, his foot up on the tailgate of the Sandman, as he polishes his boots. An angry passerby shoots Corey an evil stare as very loud hip-hop beats blast from his car stereo, but he doesn't seem to notice. From the other direction he's approached by a young man - his face painted white with black darkening his eyes and mouth. The two men were disturbingly alike.
Young man: What up, Homie? The names Lucas, but people call me “Little L” and I'm so stoked, because I just hitch-hiked all the way across America to be your partner!
Little L’s enthusiasm brings a smile to Corey Ford’s face.
Corey Ford: Well, you look the part at least… but you've got to pass the test first, okay?
Little L: Sure thing boss!
Corey: Step in to my office…
Corey Ford moves to the side of the Sandman and slides in through the window he then stretches over and kicks the passenger door until it opens.
Little L takes a seat. The inside of the sandman was cluttered with empty soda cans and take-out boxes. L picked up a dirty sock he was sitting on, but quickly dropped it again, as it was sticking to his fingers.
Corey Ford turns to face Little L with a very serious look on his face.
Corey: You ready, Homie?
Little L takes a big nervous gulp before nodding his head.
Corey: Pirate or Ninja?
Little L: Pfffft - ninja, obviously.
Corey Ford nods his head in approval.
Corey: Zombie apocalypse weapon of choice?
Little L: Rusty axe, all the way…
Corey continues to nod his head.
Corey: Okay, most important question… Mel Gibson or Harrison Ford?
Little L looks confident as hell when he hears this question.
Little L: Harrison Ford, brother!
Corey Ford tries to keep a poker face before grinning wickedly.
Corey: Welcome aboard partner!
Little L: Alright!
The two misfits high-five, but their celebration is interrupted as Corey's cell phone starts ringing.
Corey: Sorry bro, I've got to get this - it's my Nan.
The camera fades…
Big Ed demands that the bell keeper bring in the steel steps for him as the scene opens. He points to the ground and the bell keeper even sets it down for him before being commanded to leave. Showered with jeers, he strolled around the ring before taking a seat on the steps in the center of the ring. He lifted the microphone to his lips.
Ed: Gather round, Big Ed is gonna tell you a story. I call it “The piece of ass that got away.”
Mothers were already starting the cover the ears of their children.
Ed: Madison came to our shop one day looking rather homely. No chest to speak of. But I saw potential. Bitch was poor as could be. We let her sweep around the shop, clean our bikes. Things like that. She was cool.
Ed: She was young, though. So I did the only thing a gentleman would. Buy her fake tits on the eighteenth birthday.
A representative from the FCC quickly jumped on the apron and yelled for Ed to stop swearing.
Ed: You mean to tell me I can't say tits. But a guy on the Tuesday show can swear all day long while another does a reveal from Maury? Do I look PG to you?! Hell outta here with that noise!
Before the man could answer, Ed slapped him in the mouth and told him to shut up. Shocked, the man covered his own mouth and hopper down the apron. Ed takes a seat back down on the steps.
Ed: Now then. Who knew fake tits weren't the way to a woman’s heart? I got nothing for my investment. So that was strike one.
Ed: Her high functioning autism usually comes in handy when it comes to certain subjects, like money or wrestling. She could tell you just about anything wrestling related. She's got history of this business locked in her head.
Ed: She begged me to take her to Wrestelution 7 so she could could see her idol, Aries. I can oooooooonly imagine how dissapointed she is to see him now, hahaha! Anyway…
Ed: I force myself to sit through this damn thing until the main event...and he loses! So much money wasted. She cried the entire drive home, and once again, I got nothing. That, boys and girls, was strike two.
Ed: Shortly after that, this whore emptied everything I had! And not in a good way. Strike three. Now I know I've told this story, but I don't think you people grasp just how badly this broad screwed me over. So when I put her through a table, it wasn't even half of what she deserved!
Ed: All anyone is talking about is the fact that all the legends are returning. Have you all forgotten that you'll be witnessing a public execution this Sunday?
Fans started to cheer as Dennis walked down the ramp with a microphone.
Dennis: You sure do get over losses quickly. You'll fit nicely in OCW.
Ed looks to the ramp and narrows his eyes.
Ed: Let's see if you will this Sunday, kid. And you're in wrestling gear? Came to get slaughtered early?
Dennis: I'm always prepared to work. This is my life. Gotta be honest though, I've all but forgotten what a loss feels like.
The crowd gave a muffled ‘ooooooh’ when the Champion rolled into the ring.
Dennis: I didn't have a problem with you when you vandalized my car. Passionate fans do that.
Dennis: I didn't have a problem with you when you put Gap teeth through a table. I'm. a Patriots fan.
There was a mixture of boos and cheers.
Dennis: I didn't have a problem with you when you put me through a table. Wasn't the first and won't be the last. But when you attacked Madison, that's when you got my attention.
Ed smirks and folds his arms.
Dennis: Men and women have gone their entire careers without getting a match at Wrestlelution, let alone a title match. You have both opportunities not because you deserve it, but because I need to beat you when it matters most. The grandest stage.
Ed: Captain save a hoe over here, everyone.
Ed claps his hands, mocking Dennis.
Dennis: Ask yourself. If I retired a man that I respected to earn ‘this’.
Dennis points to the title around his waist.
Dennis: What won't I do to keep this title, avenge anyone from the locker room you’ve wronged, and most importantly, avenge Madison?
Dennis: You say there's going to be an execution this Sunday? I couldn't agree more. Will you kick my ass this Sunday? Most likely. Everyone does.
Dennis: But much like everyone else, just when you think you've won…
Dennis points at Ed and balls his hand into a fist.
Dennis: I’ll snatch your damn heart out from your chest and before you know it, you're looking up at the lights wondering how you couldn't put me away. That's what I do. That's ‘my’ thing. You're the biggest guy on the roster, but you're no different than anyone else. You're going to get humbled this Sunday.
Ed Lifted the stairs over his head and tossed them toward the ramp. Many in the front row ducked or covered their head for fear of getting hit.
Ed: You got balls, little man. I'm starting to see what she saw in you. Which reminds me…
Ed took a step closer and kneeled so he was eye level with Dennis.
Ed: Right before the back of her head smacked against that table, she said your name. Ain't that a bitch?
Dennis: Funny you say that. I have it on good authority you'd never be able to get her to say yours if the chance was given. Women from your past say you're far from ‘Big’.
Dennis spit in Ed’s face and backed away before taking the title off. Enraged And blinded, Ed stood up and took a swing at Dennis...
Tank vs. Axton Bravo
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I'm completely speechless... |
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That backdrop though! Time for that guy to get lifted up the card! |
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Sssh, don't complain about Bradley, he's pretty emotionally unstable... |
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Speaking of emotionally unstable... I'm told tonights main event will be Ashley Blaine taking on Brittany Sparks... That's bound to be great guys! |
Cameras take us backstage as they follow Sophia making her way down the hallway. Alex Robinson makes her way around the corner and shoulder-checks sophia as she makes her way past.
Alex: "OOOPS! Sorrrry, sweet innocent sophia -she says in coy and condescending tone."
Sophia: "Yea, I'm sure, MAN BEAST. The office is ‘that’ way."
Chants of “MAN BEAST” break out and can be heard from the audience.
Alex: "Ooh… temper temper, sweet Sophia. You wouldn't want to cloud up that head of yours before our match this weekend. I need you fresh and aware of the monumental loss I am going to serve you, so that you understand just what this all means after the ref counts the 1-2-3 on your ‘hard work’. Once I'm declared “Queen of Turmoil”, I’m going to make you my jester!! Hahah!"
Sophia’s brow furrows. She narrows her gaze on Alex and her face becomes stern.
Sophia: "Do you ‘really’ expect to just weasel your way into this match and come out the victor?"
Sophia's tone becomes patronizing: "Here comes Alex Robinson, former GM… You get taken out by Parker, disappear to take a couple of wrestling lessons, and come in here and expect to win it all? You were hated and could hardly do your job correctly back then… What makes you think you're going to walk in here and do MY job better ‘now’?"
*Alex tries to get a word in but Sophia won’t let her.*
Sophia: "I'm not going to let you make a mockery of this. Then you have the nerve to compare yourself to women like Casey Paine, who just over 10 years ago at Wrestlution 1, made history along with LaTryce Quinn by becoming OCW’s very first Women's Champion."
Sophia: "Perhaps you don't realize this isn't going to be the same cushy office desk job you're used to, having your goons run amok to do your bidding for you. Sophia points toward the outside area, referring to the ring."
Sophia: "You see, out there, is MY office, where ‘I’ work. These past few months many of us have shed blood and tears within those ropes. What ‘you’ need to do is leave whatever little vendettas and excuses you have back in the closet with your other skeletons."
Alex looks Sophia up and down, scrutinizing the woman from head to toe. She had a smirk on her face.
Alex: "Speaking of skeletons, do you even eat? I can see yours. You're so sickly...frail. It would be a shame if you couldn't make it to our match."
Sophia: "That a threat?"
Alex: "Perhaps."
Two two women had a stare down that was quickly ended by the sound of Brenda Starks. She walked in between the two women and placed an arm around both.
Brenda: "Do you smell that?"
Sophia: "I did smell fish when Alex arrived..."
Alex: "How dare you..."
Brenda quickly interjects: Enough!!
Brenda's grip on their shoulders tightened as she continued put on a calm expression.
Brenda: "Anyway. It smells like history in the making. The tenth Wrestlelution will be historic on so many levels and we are a part of that. Just think...at Wrestlelution twenty, women from Turmoil will look back and thank the both of you for paving the way."
Sophia relaxes her tightly clenched jaw, but never breaks her stare down with Alex.
Sophia: "Your greedy little hands are staying OFF the Women's Turmoil Title, and OUT of the history books. Wrestlution 10 is made up of the past, present, and the future. ‘You’, Alex, are just a NEVER WAS."
Sid Harrison vs. Jacob Trance
Axton Bravo was pissed about having lost to Tank. God damnit. Damn rope break. Still, seeing Loki was bound to cheer him up.
A security guard came rushing past him. Then another came running up behind him. Two more followed while Axton watched them run past towards the locker room.
He heard shouting and saw a few bombshells crowd around the door.
Axton came up behind them and pushed his way through: Look out, Ladies, Bravo...coming...coming.
Bravo stopped in his tracks. Laying out cold on the floor was Loki. His face was covered in blood.
Axton rushed in: Speak to me, browski!
Security Guard: Get back, Axton! Medical is on the way.
Axton looked around in disbelief. Not far from Loki’s prone body lay a chair dripping with Loki’s blood.
Axton: Tank...
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We really need to ban steel chairs Al... This is getting out of hand! |
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Fine by me, ours are leather |
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Speaking of things that look like leather, this weekend Alex Robinson will be in a womens title match, but tonight, two different women take center stage in our main event of the evening! |
MAIN EVENT
Ashley Blaine vs. Brittany Sparks
The raucous crowd that sat in anticipation of tonight's Debate had conflicting views. A small segment of the crowd, a smarky section, was holding up Ragnorak signs and chanting for Kassidy Hayes who leaned onto his podium with an unmistakable swagger. Meanwhile a slightly larger section, comprised of mostly middle aged men ensured that their voices were heard in support of Jackson Montgomery, who was standing behind his podium with a look of boredom. Meanwhile the larger section of the crowd may have not been the most vocal but their numbers made the roar unmistakable that they supported Ashley Blain in place of B-17 who appeared to be keeping his promise of not returning until Lution.
Standing in as hosts, Austin Lee and Mr. SidBerg were pandering to the crowd.
Austin Lee: SidBerg #Drum roll please my dear friend…..
Austin walks to the center of the ring as SidBerg begins the drumroll.
Austin Lee taking a deep breath before he begins: …… Ladies and gentlemen boys and girls, children of all ages the #Marvelous Movement proudly presents you the moment you have all been waiting for……..
Austin Lee doing his best Bruce Buffer impersonation: IT'S TIME!!!!!!!! Introducing first challenger number #Uno….. He is the former….FORMER! Turmoil heavyweight champion of the woooooooooorlllllllllld….Mr.Twilight himself Kassidy “Go back to Riot” Hayes…..
Kassidy glares at Lee.
Austin Lee: And to my right fighting out of the closest bar to the arena……
Jackson taking a step forward holding his title in the air, only to be stop by SidBerg who waves a finger telling him to wait his turn..
Austin Lee: Representing the one and Only #B-17, the one women who can actually make B Chill…… Ashley “#B’s Bae” Blain…
Austin walking over to Ashley giving her a #2Sweet as she shoots daggers at Austin.
Austin Lee: Chill, A…..
Austin Lee: and finally their opponent, he is the reigning defending Turmoil Heavyweight Champion of the WWWWWWOOOOOORRRRRRLLLLLDDDD…. the wrestler formerly known as B-17 drunk plus #Uno…. “Drunk Mode” Jackson Montgomery.
Crowd cheers as Austin finishes his introductions.
Sid Harrison: Woah, #Woah, #Woah…. I believe you have forgot two people my dear friend…
Austin Lee: The mighty SidBerg you are correct sir please forgive me……. And ladies and gentlemen we have saved the best for last…..
Austin Lee: INTTROOOOODDUUCING first one half of the rightful tag team champions of the WORLD!!!!! Every single mothers favorite big chick thriller, the single most dominant force on the show today the man they call SidBerg….. “The Master of the LoveShack” Sid “2Classy” Harrison …..
Austin Lee: And now introducing your host for the evening…
Sid Harrison takes the microphone away from Austin, who just looks down in shock at his empty hands then back up as he is not sure what to do with his hands now…
Sid Harrison: Let me take this one buddy…..
Austin nods as he takes a step to the side of Sid in the center of the ring
Sid Harrison: Your host for this evening ladies and gentlemen needs no introduction… he is the leader of the marvelous movement… the role model that everyone needs…. The most marvelous influence in OCW and the other have of the rightful tag team champions of the WOOORRRLLLD…… “#CAP10 Marvelous” Austin Lee...
Lee: #Now gents and whatever twilight is, remember I will host this debate fair but firm so let's get to this. First, for Drunk mode, is this title worth you showing up drunk? Or is this your plan all along so you have an excuse when you fail to retain your title, will you be sober?
Jackson’s fan base gives a roar of approval before he answers: Define “sober”. Anyway, I’m just here so I don’t get fined. He gives a smile and returns to his stupor.
Lee looks around confused as he looks over for Sid to translate.
Sid Harrison: Something about he needs a drink to understand you.
Austin Lee: Um, thank you...Anyways, for Twinkles over here: Will you go alone at Lution or will you rely on...um, Ragna….oh that’s right, Ragnasuck?
Kassidy: Every insult you hurl is just another nail in the coffin that I will personally bury you in. The real champ is the one that stands before you. Ripped away from me, the only thing I have to say to your inquiry is that perhaps my friends will deal with you.
Sid Translating again for Austin: Sorry I fell asleep for a second just continue I doubt we missed anything...
Lee: Thank you sparkles for reminding us what we were not missing when you left. Now, Miss. Blain, you lovely women…
Austin walks over putting his arm around Ashley…
Lee: #You know what I doubt you need me to ask you questions let see what you got babydoll. #GetEm
Austin holds the microphone for Ashley as he begins to laugh
Blain gives a glance at both of her opponents before straightening herself up and talking directly into the microphone: Y'all have no respect for the Turmoil Title. You have two men up here who act further from the term than most Bombshells do. Kassidy ran away from Turmoil instead of defending the title prestige! Jackson openly admitted he barely did any real work and rode B-17’s success to the top. Is this who you want representing you? Drunk and lazy and. whiny and cowardly. What #wonderful choices. There is no debate, there is only one true Turmoil Champion, B-17.
Crowd cheers. Austin and Sid begin laughing as they stand to the sides of Ashley allowing her to continue….
Blain: Dedication is what separates the real men from drunken excuses and the misunderstood bitches. I don’t recall B-17 taking shortcuts, I don’t recall him hiring goons, nor riding the coattails of others. I seem to recall him fighting for Turmoil EVERY DAMN WEEK!
Jackson: That explains why he is here! So dedicated, he rather hide behind a girl!
Crowd groans.
Sid translating again: #Where is B?
Blain stares at Jackson with contempt before replying: He's not here tonight because too many people have shown they are willing to take shortcuts at his expense. It's not like you turned your back on him, not like Kassidy and Bradley haven't had him attacked before to stop him from competing. No, B-17 isn't here to tonight because he wants the people to have hope come Lution.
Lee: What a remarkably good answer. Kass, you're a sensitive man, how do you respond?
Kassidy: B-17 is a competitor, I'm sure most would rather see him and I anyways, if I would waste an attack it would be on this drunken fool. Kass motions at Jackson. Or perhaps I’d use my resources to shut that bitch’s mouth.
Austin and Sid taking a step forward both blocking Jackson and Kassidy from Ashley. Even tho Ashley doesn't need any help to defend herself.
Lee: Good, fair, points. Kassidy, why did you and Bradley so cowardly attack B-17?
Kassidy: I do whatever it takes to win.
Lee: Are you suggesting you can’t beat B straight up?
Kassidy: I’m suggesting that B-17 is a worthy opponent, this drunkard is not, there is a reason he wasn't targeted.
Jackson: Is there something that you would like to say to my face, Kassidy?
Kassidy: Yeah, you're a disgrace and an embarrassment. A drunken fool who doesn’t deserve the spotlight. I’ve beat you before and beating you again will prove easy.
Jackson knocks aside his podium and strides over to Kassidy: I’m the champion for a reason, you will find out why at Lution. Jackson looks over at Ashley who has a look of disappointment written across her face: And you, you say B’s not here, but I believe he is. No chance he risks your fine ass. I know he was at the bar, I know he’s here...he just needs to proper motivation!
Jackson jumps at Blaine and grabs her around the throat. Kassidy, Austin, and Seb try to react but before they can’t take a few steps the lights go out.
The crowd roars in excitement.
The lights turn back on but no B-17. Jackson is looking bewildered in every direction while Kassidy backs himself into a corner expecting to fight. But Lee, Sid, and Blain all have smiles on their faces.
Distracted by the sudden lights out, Jackson doesn’t even see the swift kick, but he feels it. Pain shoots through him as he drops to the floor after a kick to the groin by Blain. He drops to the floor clutching himself. Kassidy quickly slithers out of the ring.
Lee: #Thatmusthavehurt.
Blain picks up her mic and bends down to Jackson: That's fore making me use the good whiskey on you.
Lee: Wait, wait, wait. Blain, lets not forget to thank our lights coordinator. Lee points up to the sky box and waves. The crowd looks up confused before the cameras focus on the sky box to reveal B-17.
The crowd erupts as he climbs ontop and looks down on the mess below as the show comes to an end.